Author: White Ice Widow
Title: Fear
and Loathing on Vegeta-Sei
Rating: NC-17
Summary: This is a parody of Hunter S. Thompson's Fear and Loathing in
oOo
We
were somewhere around Arillia on the edge of the
desert when the drugs began to take hold. I remember
saying something like: "I feel a bit lightheaded. Maybe you should
drive...". Suddenly there was a terrible roar all
around us and the sky was full of what looked like huge bats, all swooping and
screeching and diving around the car, and a voice was screaming: "Holy
Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?" I took hold of the flyswatter next
to me and tried to fend off the beasts, all the while rapidly losing control of
the car. Finally I jerked the fire red convertible to the side of the road, as
the creatures started to recede.
Zarbon,
who was sprawled out languidly across the passenger's side turned his head to
me and said calmly, "Jeice, what the hell are you yelling about?"
I
gave him a hard, quick glance before jumping out of the car, "Nevermind, it's your turn to drive."
'No
point mentioning these bats', I thought. 'The poor bastard will see them soon
enough.'
I
kept a weary eye out as I walked to the back of the car and opened the trunk.
We had two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of
high powered blotter acid, a salt shaker half full of cocaine, a gram and a
half of meth, fourty-five hits of ecstasy, a whole
galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers,
laughers... Also a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case
of beer, a pint of raw ether, and two dozen amyls. Of course, that was
more than needed, we are responsible adults after all, but once you start to
get into a serious drug collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you
can.
I
stuffed a few goodies in my pocket, closed the trunk and walked around the red
shark and jumped in the passenger side. Zarbon immediately took off,
concentrating hard on the road and keeping us on it.
We
hadn't driven far before we came across a young man standing on the edge of the
road holding a thumb out and grinning wildly. He was thin,
the baggy clothes he wore only accentuated that. His bright blue eyes were
cheerful, looking out from ragged, but still enticing, lavender hair. He had
obviously pale skin, that was blotched in some places
by random patches of dirt.
As
we passed him Zarbon turned to me and said, "Let's give the boy a lift. " The car suddenly swerved off to the side of the
road. "We can't stop here, this is bat country!" I yelled, looking
around frantically for the brutes.
Zarbon
jammed the shark into reverse and we rocketed backwards. We stopped as the boy
ran toward the car,holding
his bag that was slung over one shoulder. He stood next to the passenger's
side, smiling and catching his breath. 'He is quite easy on the eyes', I think
to myself.
"Hot
damn I never rode in a convertible before! " He
exclaimed. His husky voice sending delightful vibrations down
my spine and to my groin.
I
gave him a cat-like smile as Zarbon leaned back to get a better look at him.
"We're your friends. We're not like the others," he said calmly, with
that voice that hinted just a bit of mischief and sexuality that only I could
pick up.
I
spun and glared hard at him. "No more of that talk or I'll put the leeches
on you," I bark at him, then turn back to the
boy. "Get in," I said softly and he cautiously climbed into the back
seat. I caught a glimpse of his tiny rear as he tried not to dirty the white
seats.
We
screamed down the seemingly endless stretch of road. The silence was at the
least, unnerving. 'How long could we maintain,' I wondered. 'How
long before one of us starts raving and jabbering at this boy? What will
he think then? This same lonely desert was the last known home of the Manson
family. Would he make that grim connection when my attorney starts screaming
about bats and huge manta rays coming down on the car? If so
- well, we'll just have to cut his head off and bury him somewhere.
Because it goes without saying that we can't turn him loose. He'd report us at
once to some kind of outback Nazi law enforcement agency, and they'll run us down
like dogs...'
I
turned from the rear-view mirror I was staring into. 'Jesus! Did I say that? Or
just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?' I turned around slowly and
glanced at the boy whose eyes were now filled with unknowing, and a hint of fear.
I decided perhaps having a chat with the boy would put things at ease.
I
climbed into the back seat and settled down next to the lad. I reached an arm
around his shoulders and pulled him close to me, giving him a wide smile, which
he uneasily returned. Obviously startled by my action his eyes started shifting
everywhere but on me. "I want you to understand something, son." My
sudden speaking caused him to jump slightly and jerk his gaze back to mine. A
powerful bolt of lust shot through me at that motion, but I pushed on.
"That man at the wheel is my attorney. He's one of the cold-blooded
creatures. You don't have a problem with that, do you?" I asked leaning my
face towards the boy who stiffened his body and looked at the floor.
He
cleared his throat and cracked a smile at me, "N-no way" His voice
was wavering slightly, this poor child was obviously
terrified! A few very bad things flashed in my mind, as the boy stared at his
feet, still as stone. As the thought crossed my mind to act on one of those bad
things, the car jerked to the side. Zarbon was screaming and flailing about
like a scarecrow in a typhoon. The shark suddenly veered off the road and came
to a screeching halt.
"Medicane! Medicane, ugh, ah, medicane!" I worked fast, reaching into my
jacket pocket and pulling out two amyls and breaking them apart. "This man
suffers from a bad heart," I explained calmly to the petrified hitchhiker.
I leaned over the front seat and put the amyl up to his nose, "Big whiff, big whiff! Atta boy." I collapsed
back into my seat,"And one for the doctor."
I inhaled deeply then lay back calmly, sighing contentedly. Zarbon did the
same, and we three sat there in silence for uncounted minutes.
Then,
without warning, the frightened lad tried to make a run for it. I grabbed him
tightly around the waist as he tried to climb over the back. I growled
slightly as I easily pulled him into my lap, his back against my chest and my
growing erection against his soft bottom. His slight struggles ceased, and he
once again tensed as I rocked my hips upward into his. His sharp intake of
breath caught Zarbon's attention, and my companion lazily turned his head to
see what we were doing. The perverted grin that stretched across his face
seemed to cause something in the boy to snap. Without warning he began
struggling slightly again, while begging beautifully in a meek voice.
"Thank you for the ride, but I'll be fine. Just please, please, let me go.
Please, sirs, please. I don't have any money or anything of value, please, just
let me go."
Both
Zarbon and I chuckled at the last statement, as I continued to hold him firmly
in place. "We have no need for money or valuables, we're after something a
little more enjoyable and much nicer to have," My attorney said in a
sultry voice, that put the finishing touch on my throbbing prick, as he slowly
crawled into the backseat to join us, settling right in front of our current
interest who had gone statuesque again in my grip.
Zarbon
leaned forward and quickly claimed the lad's lips in a fiery wet kiss. The
boy's hands quickly gripped my thighs tightly. 'In the state of mind this child
is in right now,' I thought, 'this is looking to either be a very long process,
or a brutal rape.' I dwelled on this thought for a moment before I heard a low
moan come from the lavender-haired lad. I watched in slight shock as he fully
returned the kiss, even moved his hands to wrap around Zarbon's neck gently.
The throbbing between my legs was screaming and I instinctively bucked into a
beautiful, beckoning rear. I moved my hands from around the boy's waist slowly,
as Zarbon pulled away from the kiss. Both were panting, and staring at each
other with lust-filled eyes, as I noticed for the first time, the bulge in the
lad's pants.
I
ran my left hand up a hard chest to toy with the nipples found there, as my
right hand undid the boy's trousers expertly and reached inside. His lavender
hair whipped through the air as he threw his head back with a loud moan. As he
writhed and panted on my lap, my attention was drawn to the other man, who had
removed his black tank top and freed his swollen member from his jeans and was
stroking it slowly. Losing patience I pushed the teen forward and off my lap.
He landed inches away from Zarbon's prick and as I freed my own member from its
confines, I watched the kid slowly take the light blue penis into his mouth.
My
attorney moaned loudly, staring me dead in the eye and daring me to bitch the
boy. While the child took the cock into his mouth progressively faster and
deeper, causing angelic moans from them both, I quickly reached out and pulled
the lad's pants to his knees, causing him to shudder as the cold air assaulted
his hot flesh. I positioned him perfectly on all fours on the seat,
simultaneously moving myself between his spread thighs, my prick dripping in
anticipation.
Overwhelmed
with need and not even close to any form of sobriety, I slowly began to push
into the seemingly virginal opening before me without a single thought of
regret for not properly preparing it first. The boy's whole body tensed, he
didn't even breathe as I carefully seated myself fully in his colon. A slight
shudder ran through me at the unimaginable heat and fit of this simple being. I
stayed stationary for a moment, soaking up the sensation while looking through slitted eyes at my attorney.
He
was breathing heavily, the lad's mouth still around his cock, but completely
unmoving. It obviously proved to be an unwelcome tease that Zarbon was not
going to put up with, as he grabbed a fistful of purple hair and rammed his
organ down the slick gullet. The teen gagged violently, his body losing its tension, he gripped the thrusting hips tightly in hopes of
stilling the intrusion.
I
figured now would be as good a time as any, and pulled almost completely out of
the blissful warmth before starting a mild pace. I could tell the boy was still
in pain as his body fought between tensing up for my thrusts,
and relaxing for the other's.
Zarbon
was moaning wildly, tossing his head back and forth and squirming in his seat.
The drugs racing through his system intensified every sensation he felt. He was
not alone. The teen began slight struggles again, but was obviously weakened by
pain and fear. His silence was broken as he managed a few grunts and sobs when
his throat was momentarily cleared from the intruding phallus.
I
bit my bottom lip as my thrusting quickly grew from a subtle speed, to a hard,
violent rush to the finish. I could faintly register the sound of the boy's
gagging getting louder, and I wondered briefly if he was going to empty his
stomach contents. But before any undigested food could be produced, Zarbon
screamed raggedly and tensed, ramming himself down the orifice a final time and
draining his seed into the lad. The other man's ecstatic sounds and movements
sent me into my own sea of endorphins as I pounded into the boy and came hard.
I let out a long, low moan as my vision was stolen from me and the world became
null.
As
I slowly drifted down from my blissful reprieve, the body beneath me made a
fast movement, and my prick was ripped free of its confines. I collapsed back
on the seat, then looked up and saw the teen pushing himself out of his seat
and onto the trunk of the car as he clumsily tried to fix his trousers in a
flustered hurry. There were tears streaming down his face, and he was sobbing
slightly as he forgot about his unbuttoned garment, snatched up his bag from
the seat next to Zarbon, and slid off the end of the car. I was too far
consumed by the unmerciful feelings running through my body to fully take in
the fact of the fleeing teen, let alone stop him.
'He'll
sure have a long way to go at that speed', I thought to myself as I saw him
running feebly away from us and out of sight. Suddenly it all came rushing
back. I jerked up and looked across the seat to see Zarbon, fully clothed,
climbing into the driver's seat. Pure panic ran through my veins as I tucked my
limp organ away and fastened my pants. My attorney was moving too slow, I decided and jumped out of the car, onto the driver's
side.
The
other man looked at me curiously as I opened the door. "Scooch over, you fat bastard!! We have to get out of
Arillia before that kid finds a cop!" I yelled,
pushing him to the other side as I climbed in and quickly got us on our way. It
was absolutely imperative that we got to the Mai Hotel before the deadline for
press registration. Otherwise, we might have had to pay for our suite.
We
hadn't been driving more than ten minutes before he pulled the salt shaker of
cocaine from my pocket and began wrestling with the top. Suddenly the top flew
off and all our snow swirled off into the wind.
"Oh, Jesus! Did you see what Kami
just did to us?" Zarbon asked, looking at me as if in complete surprise.
"God
didn't do that! You did it!" I screamed at him, anger quickly flaring.
"You're a fucking narcotics agent, that was our
cocaine, you pig!"
He
gave me that look that seemed to say, 'Yes, Jeice, I'm a narc
who's driving around with thousands of dollars' worth of illegal substances in
the trunk.' I watched him out of the corner of my eye as he reached into the
glove compartment and took out a sheet of acid. He tore off a couple squares
and held them in front of my face.
"Here,
chew this. It's your half of the acid."
I
took it out of his hand and looked it over briefly before popping it into my
mouth. Delicious.
"How long do I have?" I asked him fearfully.
"Maybe
thirty more minutes. As your attorney, I advise you to drive at top speed.
It'll be a goddamn miracle if we can get there before you turn into a wild
animal," he said sternly, turning and looking at me carefully.
"Are
you ready for that? Checking into a hotel under a phony name with intent to
commit capital fraud and a head full of acid," he asked, voice dripping
with doubt.
I
took a deep breath and nodded. Thirty minutes. It was going to be very close.